Next weekend I will be going on a Women’s Retreat with our church. We will be staying at a Baptist retreat center here in Louisiana, and out of sheer curiosity (and a small about of boredom) I visited the retreat center’s website yesterday. I was looking through their “handbook” only to discover some interesting things regarding what they deem appropriate at a Christian retreat center. For example…
Dancing = definitely against the rules. Not happening.
Water-balloon fights = totally okay (when conducted outside, and under adult supervision)
Since all of us going are adults (at least in age), the water-balloon fight is looking like a distinct possibility probability. The only retreats I’ve ever been on are youth retreats. I’m assuming “women’s” retreats are similar? If so, this could be fun…
Why are there no comments on this post yet? Don’t you people know that I live for comments? This post has been up for almost 6 and a half hours, and still nothing…(although I keep checking about every 15 minutes) I want to hear your jokes about retreats and baptists and dancing and water balloons! I want your advice on how one should behave at a “women’s” retreat as opposed to a youth retreat! I want you people to make me laugh! Why do you think we even have this blog? Good grief…
A little testy today are we!!! Now that you’ve asked for jokes, I’m not too sure I want to give one! :)
Baptists dancing, well I don’t think ANYONE wants to see that! It sounds like they’re just protecting your eyes, and the dancer’s psych.
As most know, Baptists and water balloons have a very long, sometimes troubled past. From the time Little Timmy brought balloons to RA camp in the 50s to fill up with water and throw at GA’s in the next camp; to water balloons being used at most youth camps/retreats as part of the water rec day, These little pieces of rubber are seeing a comeback! I’m pretty sure no one would say anything if you brought a pack or two! (Just make sure your victim has the same since of humor)
As far as your behavior at one of these “Women retreats” I really don’t know since I’ve never been a part of one (as most of you will breath a sigh of relief). I have no doubt that you should bring plenty of tissues due to the large amounts of crying going on. I also hope that the “men bashing” will be kept to a minimum. When the temptation rises, just remember you husband at home by himself eating beans and rice (from Taco Bell). It’s ok to make a few jokes, just back them up with how wonderful your husband is (Jake you can thank me later). Last but not least, remember that you are a Lady. Please keep all bodily functions to a minimum. It’s one thing to pass gas and belch at home, and another to do it in public (See my wife). Have a wonderful time this weekend getting closer to God in an “all women” environment!
Dave <
I guess there isn’t any need for more posts. Dave’s just says it all.
I hope you have a great time, Diana.
Ok so I guess it has taken me a little while to even read your post this week but I did laugh. I think since you will probably be the youngest woman at the retreat, they should expect the water balloons. I can imagine that it would make all the women feel young again and therefore they would thank you for throwing balloons at them. Dave, is right about expecting to bring tissues. I think women go on retreats just to be able to cry.
About the dancing, I say break the rules. Then just remind the center that at least you didn’t dance naked:)
could you supply the water balloons?? i don’t have any…